Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Black 13th

Black 13th 
When i opened my eyes in this morning 
Feel something different but i can't even know what is going on to myself
When came back from Time Square 
I went to Pasar Malam too
Well , it is suppose nothing special happened today , but ...
I saw something that i'm not suppose to see  while the time that i'm searching for something 
I felt sorry to my curios and sorry about i'm not respect your privacy /.\
I'm really not means to open it and read it , SORRY 

Yesterday , again i cried
I know myself useless , even a small matter also can't solve it
When i facing any problem , i just only can share with someone that really important to me
I'm suffering /.\ I don't know how to make decision
Felt sorry to you again , i had promised that i shouldn't cry in front of you again 
But i failed to make it 
I was too dependent on you 
I'm just like a little kid that not even know how to protect myself

I love my family much but i hate them too
About 1 month that i never call or look for mum /.\
I feel shame , i feel disappointed 
Even sometime i'll ask myself , why i am a girl / Why i'm not a boy
Almost 3 or 4 month never back home 
Just because i am trying to avoid

He told me many things yesterday 
If 1 day i really can't continue my study 
I think , i'll give up /.\

Wake up please 
I should be strong 
We don't know what is the future 
May be 1 day u will leave me too
I should prepare for this
I should be more brave 
I should be independent 

God Bless Me

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